My Belgian family has a knack for weird stories. Fake suicides that become real. Covering up for Russian spy networks during WWII, and marrying exotic dancers with fake names stolen from novels. They lost many houses to gambling, and many lovers to drink. No wonder they ended up ruined.
But despite their madness, they were also survivors. A great, great uncle survived close to two years in a concentration camp at 60. When he was released, he avoided the issue by joking that the “simplified meals” helped him get rid of gout.
My great uncle made his way out of occupied Belgium and France bribing guards with cognac.
And my grandparents and father survived 13 days in a lifeboat with scarce food and water after their boat was sunk by a German U-boat.
Through the years, they have been my inspiration. All of them…except my grandmother. She is reported to have spent the 13 days in the lifeboat putting foundation powder on her face to look immaculate while repeating “this can’t be happening” like a mantra.
She made it through in one piece. And now that the first thing I do every morning is to put on lipstick, I have a newfound understanding and respect for her. Like her, this simple routine helps me feel like myself again.
We all are different. And we all have our ways to cope. For me, it’s lipstick and meditation; for you, it may be yoga, and, for others, it's a zoom happy hour. The important thing is to check with ourselves:
What do we need to feel more calm and centered?
What brings a little bit of happiness and joy to our life right now?
Is it reasonably healthy for us emotionally and physically?
Is it respectful of other people’s well-being?
And then go for it, without self-judgment and with loads of compassion.
Love,
Nathalie